Last night, I looked towards the south and witnessed a smoky hue drifting upon the air. A distant murmur, barely audible, whispered upon a breeze. What could this phenomena be? I rushed inside and turned on the television and behold the mystery was revealed. Democrats lost the 6th congressional district of Georgia.
Oh, the wailing and moaning by libtards near and far as they witnessed their $30 million campaign donations consumed in a spectacular funeral pyre. Why? Oh, why? They asked. Why don’t the American people love us? Why are we forsaken?
Democrats thought they had the perfect Trojan horse. They wheeled out a young man who seemed pleasant and reasonable; someone who reputedly espoused the same values as these conservative Georgians.
But the citizens peered over the gate and they saw in the distance San Fran Nancy Pelosi and her degenerate horde laying in wait. The alarm bells rang and these patriots ran to the polls in the tens of thousands to stave off an unholy jihad of centralized government and anti-Christian morals and values.
It was hand to hand combat as Marxists, sexual deviants, and various bands of teat squawkers tried to breach the walls. But these brave Georgians beat these anti-American miscreants back and saved their district from the clutches of a San Franciscan hag.
And there, these patriotic warriors keep a vigilant eye from their watch towers as smoke and sparks waft from a $30 million funeral pyre.