Are You a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner? Here is a little test that will help you decide. The answer can be found by posing the following question:

You are walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.   Suddenly a Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, Raises the knife, and charges at your family...

You are carrying a Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your Family.   What do you do?

Democrat's Answer:

• Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

• What is a Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP?

• Does the man look poor or oppressed?

• Is he really a terrorist? Am I guilty of profiling?

• Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

• Could we run away?

• What does my wife think?

• What about the kids?

• Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?

• What does the law say about this situation?

• Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it?

• Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?

• Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

• Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?

• If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?

• Should I call 9-1-1?

• Why is this street so deserted?

• We need to raise taxes, have paint & weed day.

• Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

• I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.

• This is all so confusing!

............ ......... .......... ......... ......... ......... ........ ......... .

Republican's Answer:

BANG!

............ ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... ......

Southerner's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

Click..... (Sounds of reloading)

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

BANG!

BANG!

BANG!

Click

Daughter: 'Nice grouping, Daddy!'

'Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?!'

Son: 'Can I shoot the next one?!'

Wife: 'You ain't taking that to the Taxidermist!

 

H/T:  Ray