Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Forget About Banning Guns. Ban White Men!



A history and gender studies professor has come to the conclusion that white men are the bane of civilization.  The wizard from Pasadena believes the predator, also known as the white male, has a privilege complex.  And if this animal doesn’t get his way, then all hell will break loose.

“Are white men particularly prone to carrying out the all-too-familiar mass killings of which last week’s Aurora shooting is just the latest iteration? Is there something about the white, male, middle-class experience that makes it easier for troubled young men to turn schools and movie theaters into killing fields? In a word, yes.”

Professor Hugo Schwyzer concludes:

“White men from prosperous families grow up with the expectation that our voices will be heard. We expect politicians and professors to listen to us and respond to our concerns. We expect public solutions to our problems. And when we’re hurting, the discrepancy between what we’ve been led to believe is our birthright and what we feel we’re receiving in terms of attention can be bewildering and infuriating. Every killer makes his pain another’s problem. But only those who’ve marinated in privilege can conclude that their private pain is the entire world’s problem with which to deal. This is why, while men of all races and classes murder their intimate partners, it is privileged young white dudes who are by far the likeliest to shoot up schools and movie theaters.”

Obviously, we must do something about people like me.  We white dudes must be segregated from the general population.  Forget banning guns!  Ban white men.  We are the true danger to society.  Don’t believe me?  Just watch Life Time.  My God, I barely trust myself after having to sit through that.  I thought we were watching National Geographic.  There was the white man deep in the Serengeti preying upon women, children and minorities.  Their gazelle like eyes popping out in fear from want of protection from these white male predators.  The horror, so help me god the horror.

Senator Dianne Feinstein needs to forget about banning assault weapons.  She must do something about the most evil, lethal predator known in American society:  the white male.

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